Classes for Wives

Okay, so recently when the AJC had an article about the "classes" for pastors' wives at a denominational seminary which shall remain nameless, I scoffed...as did I'm sure most of you. And I was angry. Livid. Then I got on with my life. But as I've lived through my husband's first two years of ministry, I have decided that there are some classes from which I would have benefitted. Here are some examples:

* How to be Carrie Underwood / Tammy Wynette and Still Maintain Your Independence (you know...Stand by Your Man!)
* The Pastor's (or in our case Pastors') Night Out (I've discovered what works best often reminds me of a Jimmy Buffet song, which I cannot name here because, well, I am the pastor's wife...)
* How to Teach your Children to Respect their Elders when the Elders (as in older people, not church leaders) Don't Always Show Respect to Others
* How To Love In Spite Of...
* How to Flick Someone Off Without Being Noticed
* How to Make a Casserole in Under Ten Minutes
* How to Look Like All is Well Even When It's So Very Far From It
* How to Make the Fat Lady Sing (you know, so it will be over, already!)
* How to State Your Mind without Opening Your Mouth (bumper stickers work for me...)
* How to Make Sure Church Remains Safe and Fun for your Kids In Spite of the Evil Within(this is a serious one...)
* What to Say When People Think Your Spouse Does it for the Money

So that's it for now. I'm sure I will think of more as the days go by, and will add them as I am able. Until then, your suggestions for teachers or teaching tips are much appreciated!